Brett Sampson, “Ye Ought to Forgive”, October 7 2014,
BYU-I Devotional
Let's first consider what it means to forgive all men and
women, generally. To be a forgiving person, we have a sensitive, empathetic,
and charitable heart toward everyone around us. We look at others the way Jesus
sees us all.
Not long ago, from this same pulpit, our university
president, Kim B. Clark, said that after being cut off on the roads many times
while driving, he concluded he would be much better off just deciding that the
person in the other car must be having a heart attack--or a baby--and that they
must be focused on that concern as they so carelessly rush to what must be the
hospital.
My version of that same perspective is that when someone
around me makes any form of unkind or careless gesture, I think, How terrible
is their day--or their life--that they would be so inconsiderate or that they
would be so quick to lose their temper?
We are all on a journey of perfection, yet far from it. You
and I have our shortcomings, and we should be grateful others are willing to
overlook ours. Spencer W. Kimball said:
So long as mortality exists we live and work with imperfect
people; and there will be misunderstandings, offenses, and injuries to
sensitive feelings. The best of motives are often misunderstood. It is
gratifying to find many who, in their bigness of soul have straightened out
their thinking, swallowed their pride, forgiven what they had felt were
personal slights. (Spencer W. Kimball,Conference Report, Apr. 1955, 98)
One thing I have learned in my years as a bishop is that
everyone has burdens. Whether we have sickness in our own hearts or our hearts
ache for someone we love who is suffering, each one of us has pain in our lives
and needs the charity Jesus has taught us to have as His disciples. The essence
of the gospel is to love one another as He loves us. I believe that means when
we look around, we see in every face a child of God who deserves to be loved.
I hope you will receive this next example as reverently as I
intend it to be. Often as I am in any group of people, like today, this is how
I see the crowd. Imagine with me that: he just failed a test; she just learned
her mother has cancer; she feels her roommates don't like her; he wonders if
God hears his prayers; she just had a fight with her brother; his fiancé just
broke up with him; he is terribly homesick; and she is struggling with
repentance. We could go on, but you get the idea.
When I look at any gathering, I really do see my brothers
and sisters--individuals whom God loves and whom I love--men and women who
certainly have hurt in their lives and who deserve my respect and immediate
forgiveness, if necessary. As the children's Primary song says, "Jesus
said love everyone; Treat them kindly too. When your heart is filled with love,
others will love you" ("Jesus Said Love Everyone,"Children's
Songbook, 61).
How Do We Forgive?
So after considering what forgiveness is (and is not), why
we must forgive, and all of those we should forgive, how do we go about
forgiving?
There are wonderful, specific, and practical tools to be
learned from a little study online, from books, and from working with our
bishop or with a trained counselor; but at the center of our efforts to forgive
should be what I shared at the beginning of my message today. We must look to
God in faith and let go of the unnecessary burden we put on our own backs if we
unforgivingly cling to pain, resentment, or worse. To borrow a phrase from our
fellow Christian brothers and sisters, we should, "Let go and let
God."
We can forgive by unloading the rocks from our pockets as we
allow those we perceive to have wronged us to work out their own salvation with
the Savior. Their forgiveness really is between them and the Lord. So we should
let them wrestle through their own repentance, and instead perhaps repent of
judging them ourselves.
In Luke 6:41 we read, "And why beholdest thou the mote
that is in thy brother's eye, but perceivest not the beam that is in thine own
eye?" Just imagine what the world would be like if everyone followed this
gospel teaching and was careful to first be concerned with their own hearts,
along with their treatment of others. Spencer W. Kimball proposed:
If we would sue for peace, taking the initiative in settling
differences--if we would forgive and forget with all our hearts--if we would
cleanse our own souls of sin, bitterness, and guilt before we cast a stone or
accusation at others--if we would forgive all real or fancied offenses before
we asked forgiveness for our own sins--if we would pay our own debts, large or
small, before we pressed our debtors--if we would manage to clear our own eyes
of the blinding beams before we magnified the motes in the eyes of others--what
a glorious world this would be! (Faith Precedes the Miracle, Spencer W. Kimball,195-96).
The Lord knows our hearts; he knows our intentions and our
potential, just as He knows the same things about those who may have hurt us.
We can forgive by understanding God's role in our lives and by letting Him be
the eternal keeper of justice while we focus our energies on loving Him and
loving our neighbor. On a number of occasions, Gordon B. Hinckley said
variations of the following:
May God help us to be a little kinder, showing forth greater
forbearance, to be more forgiving, more willing to walk the second mile, to
reach down and lift up those who may have sinned but have brought forth the
fruits of repentance, to lay aside old grudges and nurture them no more.
(Gordon B. Hinckley, "Forgiveness," Ensign, Oct. 2005)
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